i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
