Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
