If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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