Umm I'm too high to move.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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