And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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