in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
