The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
