I am in a vortex of obligation.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize