Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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