The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
