btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
