see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
