i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize