Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
