Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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