we have officially mastered the walk of shame
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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