hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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