oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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