just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
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