Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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