i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
