i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
