Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Randomize
