As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
