Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
