Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
