i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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