ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
