I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
