He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize