just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
