i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
