So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
