In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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