She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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