We're facebook friends in real life
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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