So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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