I must be too annoying 4 u.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
