Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize