So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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