I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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