yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
