it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
