I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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