do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
