My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Couch. On fire.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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