T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
