Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Shame is for Republicans.
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