Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize
