Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize