I'm eating all of the evidence.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
i've created a new STD.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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